“No man is an island”- John Donne
I’ve got news for you - you aren’t the smartest person you know. Especially when it comes to making big decisions. Why? Because you are too close to the situation to be objective and that makes you vulnerable. It’s important to get wise counsel when making some decisions.
Though no one knows better than you what’s at stake, what you stand to lose or gain, and how it feels to face what you are facing, there’s really good reasons why an objective point of view can help.
Wise counsel will:
Seeing the forest for the trees: Sometimes you are too close to a situation to be objective. If the stakes are really high, your ego and your fears may talk you into a frenzy. A...
Decision-making doesn’t have to be limited to thinking things through. Decision-making can include strategies like putting pencil to paper and writing some things down. The utilitarian process is great for visual people who are practical and logical in their thought processes.
The utilitarian process is simple. Follow these steps to making a utilitarian decision.
Step #1. Grab a piece of paper and a pencil
Step #2. List the decision to be made at the top of the page
Step #3. Draw a line down the middle of a paper.
Step #4. List all the reasons for your decision on the left-hand side of the page
Step #5. List all the reasons against your decision on the right-hand side of the page
Step #6 Add up the totals
Step #7 Go with the side that has the highest score
It stands to reason that the side with the highest score determines the...
The diffusion of responsibility is the act of failing to do something, believing that someone else will or already has. There have been studies done where subjects witness violence and fail to take action, believing someone else will or already has called 911, or intervened. They stand by and watch abuse and violence and fail to make any decisions to stop it because they are part of a crowd.
Waiting on someone else to make a decision won’t directly make your life any easier. As a matter of fact, waiting on someone else to make a decision can lead to you getting the worse end of the deal. People tend to do what is best for them, considering others but not putting their needs ahead of their own. Waiting on someone else to make a decision might lead to a worse situation than you would have had by taking the lead.
Here are some ways to take responsibility when decisions need to be...
A lot of times we know the best decision right out of the gate. Research, time, and wise counsel help solidify that decision and ultimately, we knew we were right all along. Trusting your gut can help you make the right decisions.
Is trusting your gut impulsive?
Not at all. Your gut is like a GPS connected to your values and morals. Your gut knows what you should be doing and is a teeny, tiny radar alerting you to what is right and what is wrong.
Is trusting your gut self-serving?
Yes, in the best of ways! Your gut isn’t there to fool you into shenanigans. If anything, your gut is like the wiser older sibling who warns you about impending danger or encourages you to believe in yourself or an idea. In this case, self-serving is in service rather than arrogance.
Can trusting your gut cause poor decisions?
Of course. No one is immune from making a poor choice here and there. Mistakes are going...
A Google search for the definition of passive describes a passive person as someone who fails to take action but instead lets things happen to them.
Being passive generally describes someone who chooses not to take any action and might conjure an image of a frail person - unable or unwilling to make a decision. That is one example, but there are multiple ways being passive expresses itself.
Being passive looks like teamwork: Some passive people are excellent team players. Their go-with-the-flow attitude makes it easy to be in a relationship with them. Having passive people on a team can make taking the lead easy for type A personalities.
Being passive looks like insecurity: Some passive people are insecure about their ability to make a choice, so they don’t. This can make it hard to be in relationships because passivity can become an anchor. Being in a relationship with someone who can’t or won’t...
Disney is the host of a children’s show called Doc McStuffins. Doc is a young girl who can magically talk to toys and help them feel better when they get hurt or sick. She’s a toy doctor with a mom who is a physician and a stay-at-home dad. One of the best things about the Doc McStuffins show is the way they tackle modern day issues with flare.
One episode highlights the gender-based notion that a female is bossy when she is decisive. That boys are being the boss when they are decisive, but the girls are being “bossy,” which is considered a negative personality trait.
In the episode, Queen Amina’s castle is knocked down and in complete shambles. Everyone agrees that the castle must be put back together again, but no one can agree on how and pandemonium ensues. Finally, Queen Amina begins to take the lead and begins to formulate a plan to get the castle pieces sorted and back together. She...
Decision-making is a process. From the moment the issue presents itself, to sorting through the issue, and up until making a final decision, there’s a process. Procrastination ruins the process.
Procrastination is a thief. It robs a situation of its potential to be easier and well-thought-out. Procrastination causes panic, poor choices, and settling for less. Procrastination shortens the process and eliminates important aspects because there’s no more time to figure things out.
How the process works:
When an important decision needs to be made, it takes time and energy to sort out the issues and research the proper decision. Under the best circumstances, you can do your homework, consult someone, and meet with your family to come to a conclusion in a reasonable amount of time. Allowing plenty of time to figure things out generally leads to a sound decision that is the best under the circumstances.
Making decisions usually affects more than just yourself. Families are a unit and even single people live in a form of community in some way, whether through extended family or work-related relationships. Many decisions make an impact on others and not considering that impact can be foolish.
Seeking win-win solutions is an important skillset in your decision-making tool kit. Finding ways to make decisions that account for more than one impact is a good idea.
When making decisions, consider these dos and don’ts.
Do: Give yourself ample time to think things through so you don’t unintentionally hurt someone else. Making decisions too fast can result in collateral damage you hadn’t considered. Give yourself time to do your homework and make sure your decision has the smallest impact on others as possible.
Do: Ask for guidance. A lot of tough decisions can have a softer impact if key...
One of the reasons people avoid making decisions - or, at the very least, find it hard to make decisions - is the fear that a poor decision will have lasting negative results. It’s healthy to have a low-lying fear that a hasty decision can lead to a bad outcome. That should help people think things through, do their homework, and consider the costs before making their choices.
The problem lies when people avoid making a decision and take no action at all.
There are some truths and lies about making decisions that should be considered whether the outcomes are good or bad. Check them out:
Lie: A poor decision can be fatal to your career, relationships, or finances
Truth: You are not defined by your worst mistake or your greatest triumph. There is no way you’ll make the right decision all the time. Whether your choices end up fatal or famous, neither situation lasts for long. Make the...
A key to honing decision-making skills is taking your time and doing your research. Making impulsive decisions can lead to regret, so take your time and do your homework before you decide. Taking the time to make sure you have all the information you need to make an informed decision is the responsible way to come to a conclusion.
Many people are motivated by their feelings more than the facts. When it’s all said and done, going with your gut might be the best way to make a decision, but up until that time - do your homework.
What are the benefits of doing research before making a decision?
Doing your homework reduces mistakes: Sometimes you don’t have vital information up front. Doing your homework allows you to avoid mistakes by acting too quickly without enough information. Digging deeper into a subject and examining the evidence might help you make a choice that you didn’t consider initially.
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